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NEW BLOG: hellolaura.com

i had a dream about epipen.

i think i'm going to get a new blog. this one kind of sucks. and i'm not even a pancake villian anymore.

i got an e-mail from my mom today that said this:
"We are really proud of you."

thank you. that was all i needed.

THIS JUST IN, 2

this is day 2 of working from home. when i woke up this morning and my forecast fox said -17, i said, "fuck you forecastfox," and then decided to work from home. i've actually gotten quite a bit done. you really can do a lot while sitting in front of a tv watching soap operas.

also
IS EVERYONE'S GODDAMNED BABY NAMED EMMA? it's a pretty name but i swear that if you are a sorority girl or a soap opera character who has had a baby girl after 2007, it's name is emma. it's a nice name but it's starting to get on my nerves and this is why: rachel (on friends) had a baby named emma and it's my theory that people are naming their babies after her. similar to the theory that if you are a sorority girl or a soap opera character who has had a baby boy after 2007, chances are it's name is aidan. i swear. to. god. i'm going to name my baby seitan. if i have one. which i won't.

THIS JUST IN:

courtney wants to date tim tebow--

can you blame her? spending five minutes with the man will make you a better person.

do you guys remember that episode of seinfeld where elaine and george's luck switch? so he ends up having really good luck and her's is bad. in the meantime, seinfeld is totally balanced-- at one point, someone cancels a gig that he has and five minutes later, someone else calls to schedule a gig for the exact same day.

this is a roundabout way to say that i think my luck (at least, yesterday's) was like seinfeld in that episode. playing stupid saved me $65 on a city parking permit, and then i ended up having to pay $61 to get a front license plate put on my car. it was very weird.

just because you live in a large city doesn't mean things have to be difficult. yesterday's adventure of getting a driver's license, getting a title, getting car tags and getting a city permit took all of 1.5 hours. it ruled.

also, i got a perfect score on my written driving test. I AM THE BEST DRIVING TEST-TAKER, EVERRRRRRRR. chris brown apparently works at the driver's license office at the thompson center; he takes awful pictures of people for their IDs. i had to give up the best ID photo i've ever had (on my kansas ID i renewed on my 22nd birthday) and ended up with the worst picture ever. resulting conversation:
me: is it possible to get a different picture for my driver's license?
chris brown: no.
me: ...what if i pay to have it retaken?
chris brown: no, you can't.
me: ...so you can never get another picture on your driver's license?
chris brown: you can if you get married.
me: ...and that's it?
chris brown: or if you move from illinois.

in conclusion, chris brown wants to marry me AND it looks like i'll be moving from illinois in a few years because...holy shit...

today i have the black lung, i think i projected my mom's bronchitis onto myself for the win. yay mom.